Concentrate on Now.

This weekend, for the first time in my life, I was fired from a job.

I understood, entirely, even though it was only my third night there. I just wasn't able to grasp the menu and keep up with the other waitresses. It was embarassing. About two hours before the end of my shift, I knew my co-workers were complaining about me and began to have an anxiety attack. Since we weren't swamped, I informed one of them and she told me to step outside.

This job was sort of the culmination of my frustrations with life. I'd been putting a lot of pressure onto myself to figure out what I'm doing for a career, and just forgetting to take time to breathe. So as I'm standing outside in the autumnal cold, my co-worker Amy came out to check on me. And despite the fact that I know she was frustrated with me, I felt like I connected with her on a personal level.

Because basically she said in two minutes the exact words I had needed to hear for months. She was a bit older than me, married, and in grad school. The vibe of cool and knowledgeable exuded from her. She said to me, "Miles, this isn't the end of the world. Just take time and relax, we're here to help you."

Of course, it was much more elaborate and profound to me than that; I wish I knew the exact words. But after we had spoke, I just stopped being tense. After months of struggling with it, I just stopped.

Sometimes I think I was fated to work there if for no other reason than to hear those exact words I had needed someone to say to me.

As we were cleaning up that night, my boss called me upstairs. I knew what she was going to say and was prepared for it. And frankly, I'd had enough of the job. I respected everyone I worked with, but that job just was NOT for me. I slowly walked upstairs and she gently let me go. I went down, grabbed my coat, and clocked out without saying good night, even though I wasn't really upset with anyone, just myself.

But, dear Amy, wherever you are, I hope you know that I am forever grateful to you. And that if I could ever just go back and say "good night, and thank you so much," I would.

And now I have relaxed, and I am just going to concentrate on the here and now.